Keep your dependence and independence in balance. Tell and show your partner how much you need them, but don’t cling, as that can make your partner feel trapped.

Make some time for the two of you. Find a way to free up an afternoon or an evening where you won’t be disturbed by phone calls, children, friends, work, school, etc.

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Tell the truth. Communication is much simpler when you tell the whole truth. Even if your partner doesn’t like what you said or disagrees with you, it’s easier to deal with your differences when you’re being honest.

Honesty builds your partner’s trust and respect more than any other quality. You can be great in every other quality, but that won’t make up for dishonesty in your relationship!

Forgive and move on.

Forgive your partner out loud for a shortcoming or mistake he or she made. Be willing to move past it. It’s fine to explain the impact the other person’s action had on you, but also state how you’re going to move past it. Forgiveness invites empathy into a relationship and reminds you that you’re both human. Make deposits in the “forgiveness” bank. Make withdrawals when you yourself need to be forgiven.

Invest Your Time. - Without quality time, your relationship will not survive. Carve out at least half an hour a night, and at least one day a month when you the two of you spend time exclusively together. I know this is easier said then done, especially if you have little children. But it is essential for a healthy partnership.

Learn to laugh together

Shared laughter is a surefire way to keep the connection with your partner vibrant. When you laugh, you’re tapping into the playful energy that transcends life’s stresses. When you and your partner make each other laugh, this energy feeds intimacy and life becomes a little less daunting. Make time for mutual playfulness and make fun of life’s absurdities -this will help you both cope with stress, develop perspective and achieve a greater sense of togetherness.

Learn to listen to your emotions

The first step in using your emotions to create deeper intimacy is to identify what you are feeling.

The second step is to communicate your feelings in a way that will foster intimacy and create a mutual understanding between you and your partner. It will always be easier to share positive feelings than feelings that might elicit defensiveness in your spouse or partner.

To help reduce the likelihood that your partner will become defensive, ask yourself the following question before discussing sensitive issues: “How can I talk about these feelings and my needs so that my partner will be open and responsive to what I’m saying?”

Don’t avoid saying what is in your heart or on your mind to say. Say it! It will go a long way to deepen your intimacy!

Don’t hide your worries because you don’t want him to know that you are not in control. Share them! Watch the intimacy between you soar!

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No problem is too trivial if it keeps you away from each other. The worst thing that you can do is to let the problem linger and pile up. To let resentment and tension rise within you until you explode with anger at each other. Tell your partner in the most diplomatic way if there is an issue that irritates you. Character assassination is the most horrible thing that you can do to your partner. When confronting, directly trigger the act not the person. However, there are some couples that let the “heat” die down before confronting. When the emotions are too raw they would rather let it heal for a while before discussing the issue.

Quality of life matters. Luckily for us, love and intimacy are renewable resources that actually increase through use. The more we allow and enjoy love and intimacy, the more we are nourished at the core of our being.

There are many factors that help sustain a relationship: kindness, respect, attention, caring, communication, tolerance, humor, the sharing of activities and life experiences. A relationship can be sustained and enjoyed when these resources are present. And then there’s sex. The intimacy that arises from meaningful sexual connection gives a relationship a whole other level of sustainability. Beyond just existing as a couple, we radiate love into the universe, returning and replenishing that which has made our own hearts sing.

Respect is an important component in any mutually beneficial relationship whether it is marital, friendship, family or business. Fortunately, you have the power to build respect by the way in which you conduct your life.

If you have true respect for one another, then nothing can go wrong. You just have to find the right person to respect, this is the hard part.

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Ask questions, clarify, don’t assume. Do not talk if your mind is not clear or full of anger. When you feel hurt, do not say “you don’t love me / you never loved me” or “let’s break up” or “when do you want to break up?”. You will regret one day. Tell him or her you feel hurt, and ask for clarification first.

Treat your partner the way you want to be treated. Be gentle and kind. Apologize if your partner feels hurt (but don’t let them make you feel bad). Apology does not mean you are bad, it only means you care.

Be the first to tell your partner, either positive or negative. Trust is as essential as respect.

Communicate with your partner. Without communication, there is no relationship. Stay in touch by, for example, calling your partner even if it’s just to say ‘hi’ and ‘I love you’.

Avoid any activity that could cause your partner to experience doubt, suspicion or distrust.

There is no such thing as a PERFECT relationship. Sure, most of the time you’ll be compromising. But don’t get shocked or overly depressed because of arguments or fights. This will come for SURE. Without arguments and fights, your relationship will NOT grow stronger.

Keep your expectations about the relationship realistic.

The key to having respect in your relationship and to having respect in other relationships starts with you. Similar to trust, respect is something that evolves over time and begins by the initiation of respect for each other within the relationship from the relationships onset. However in order for you to be respected, you must first respect your self. There is power in your opinion of yourself, and that opinion will be shown by your own overall demeanor.

How you respect your self will drastically effect how others perceive you, and thus how they respect or disrespect you to some extent. If you do not have a healthy level of self confidence in yourself, you may be perceived as being weak, and many people may look to take advantage of that. Or, they may not readily give you the respect that they should based on your feelings of apprehension, and you are likely to be less respectful of others, treating them within the same mannerisms as you treat your self without necessarily knowing it.

Know when to say no.

Instead of agreeing to have sex with him when you actually don’t feel like doing it at the moment, say no. Gently tell him the reason why. Once you’re man feels that he won’t be able to impose anything on you, then he’ll learn to give you some respect.

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Have strong boundaries:
In a relationship, you want to clearly identify for yourself how you want to be treated and define what behaviour is acceptable and what is unacceptable early on. You don’t need to be ruthless with your values but the moment you let your partner walk over or manipulate you even once, is when you lose all respect. This should be a mutual setup where you are also willing to respect your partner’s boundaries, even if they differ from yours.

Talk it over with your partner. Let him know what you are feeling… what you want more out of live… and what the things you would like to do. Remember… your partner cannot read your mind. So you need to TELL them what you want because after all… logically, your partner cannot know what you want until you tell them… right?

Are you in a dead end relationship? You are not getting much out of your relationship and you would like to achieve more with your relationship. There are many types of relationship and if you’re not happy with the type of relationship that you’re in then it’s time to find yourself another relationship. It’s a difficult thing since you can be attached to your current partner but if it’s not working out then it’s time to say Good Bye to them.

You’ve given it your all. You’ve even tried counseling. You’re considering leaving the relationship and even though things still aren’t working right, you’re not sure if leaving the relationship is the best thing to do.

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We talk about when to leave a relationship in this post so you can decide for yourself if leaving the relationship you are in is right for you.

Usually your gut instinct will be the first sign that things are not going well in your relationship, you will feel that something is just not right, that something has changed and it is not for the better. Perhaps these feelings will begin to show as anger and coldness

where as before you felt kindness and warmth with your partner, these could be the first signs that something is amiss and the relationship is beginning to fail or it could be nothing more than just a stage in your relationship through which you will pass. So how can you tell which it is? There are other signs that could give you a clue as to if the relationship is doomed or if you will survive, some of the most common signs include:

Your relationship feels insecure.  You or your partner experience lots of jealousy. Trust is one of the key elements in a good relationship.  Now I’m going to assume here that you or your partner wouldn’t actually DO anything to undermine your relationship.  So, if you wouldn’t, where is that feeling coming from?  If you’ve experienced some major betrayal in your life, make sure you spend some time dealing with your trust issues.  If you don’t have “general trust issues”, then your uneasiness is probably rooted in your intuition telling you that the situation just isn’t right.  Listen to your intuition, and leave.

Your life priorities have changed significantly. Major life changes often force people to reconsider what’s important, and this can make a once-healthy partnership lose its bearings. A near-death experience such as a serious accident or illness, being unexpectedly fired from a job, or losing a family member can cause anyone to reevaluate his or her life and decide to make some changes. Everything looks different after such an experience, and some things lose their meaning. When this happens, these new ways of seeing things must be addressed, since it’s unlikely that such changes will just disappear.

Take some time and define what love means to you–and what it’s not. You mention that this man did not support you. In your “What love is” column, you could elaborate on what support means to you. In your “What love isn’t” column, talk about not being supported. The idea is to be very clear in what love is to you and what it isn’t. By doing this, you will know when you see it and when you don’t.

It’s time to end a relationship when the other person stops offering love and commitment into the relationship. When he/she is not focused on going forward and growing in the same direction as the other person. If you love someone and they are not recipicating the same…and their actions are speaking WAY louder than their words, it might be time to consider seperating. The longer you are in a relationship, the harder it may be to heal. I believe if you are always having doubts about the relationship and you constantly are having to seek reasurrance if the other person loves you and wants to be with you, it’s not meant to be. It shouldn’t be THAT hard. There should be the bare essentials in a relationship. And love that is transparent from one person to the next in the relationship shouldn’t be hard to detect.

Breaking up with someone is never easy. Your heart will try and do everything it can not to feel pain. But through the pain, you will feel and overwhelming sense of peace and you will know, it’s the right thing. I’ve been there, I know. About breaks…again it’s different for everyone. Time away can be great. But if a couple is only taking a break to date other people to see if their relationship will last or to see if they really do want to be with the other person, I think that’s pointless. If you truly love someone, you will stick with them and work it out no matter what the cost. If you’re taking a break to be alone and to really think about the relationship, pray, or whatever you may do, I think that’s an honest break. It comes down to this. As much as you may love someone and want to be with them, there is no promise that they will want the same, especially if they aren’t putting in the effort.

It’s all about communication as well. If you never talk about the relaites of what both you of you want and where you see the relationship is going, what’s the point? You have to be open with eachother. I’m not saying to start discussing this two weeks into the relationship, but as trust is built, things need to be talked about. Otherwise you will go into the relationship nieve and will end up getting hurt. Bottom line is, don’t settle. If the relationship is hurting you, get out of the relationship. You deserve someone that will love you more than you’ve ever dreamed!

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Know when it’s time to leave and make the break. Don’t let anyone use you or abuse you. Most problems can be worked out if both people in the relationship make an effort to improve things. There are some exceptions. It’s time to leave if the relationship becomes abusive. Do not hope things will get better because he/she says they will change. Leave! If at some future time they actually do change, you can consider getting back together then. Another deal breaker is infidelity.

If your partner cheats on you, there is a good chance that even if you do stay together, the trust that keeps a relationship alive will be gone. I’m not saying you can’t survive it, but it will take a great deal of effort from both people and your partner will have to stop. Never give them more than one chance to do so or you will be setting yourself up for a very destructive emotional roller coaster. If your partner sees that it’s possible to cheat and you will keep forgiving, why would they change?

You are in love and it feels wonderful. This love is different and you are prepared to do anything to make it last. To prevent this ship from sinking you work hard to steer this relationship into a safe harbor. In the process you lose yourself and your romantic relationship becomes all-consuming!

A truly loving relationship is a relationship where each person accepts and even values the differences between them. If you have to excessively bend your values to preserve the relationship, what are you preserving? You are not preserving a loving relationship since love does not demand that you excessively bend your values.

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At last, you have found the person of your dreams; the one you’ve been searching for all of your life, and then one day you begin to feel a little trapped, with no time just for yourself. Most people want to a have a healthy relationship with their ideal soul mate but in order to keep this relationship on an even keel, it is imperative to have a little “me” time too.

It is not ideal for you to always be with your partner. This is a common mistake made by many couples, whether they are still in the honeymoon stage of their love affair or they have been together for years. If you create time for yourself you will have a lot more to offer to your partnership.

Women value the connection over confrontation in relationships. Women will try to work things out far more than fighting and showing her true self. Women like keeping peace within relationships. This is why many women agree with what their boyfriend says, go along with whatever his beliefs, opinions, or feelings are. They lose themselves in him.Some women are blind to what’s going on, yet everyone close to them sees them disappearing, hoping they find themselves again.

Realize when you’re “giving yourself over.” Healthy romantic relationships require compromise on both parts. To keep your personal identity, recognize when you’re acting on behalf of the relationship (such as going to boxing matches with your sweetie or making some sort of sacrifice) versus soaking up new likes or activities that aren’t who you are (such as taking on the “I love boxing!” mentality).

First, get clear on what you need in order to feel good about yourself. You need to be really clear about that and to communicate those things to the person you’re going to be with.

Imagine yourself in a relationship where you get to be yourself and you allow the other person to be themselves. What you’ll get is two happy, joyful people, who are growing and thriving. That is a powerful relationship with lots of room for freedom, passion, love and joy.

Pleasing your significant other is definitely a goal and mark we should all make for ourselves, BUT, it should be in moderation without compromising yourself. Remember, they gave you a shot because of WHO you are and not what they think they can mold you into. Relationships are about compromising but at the same time, you have to be your own person as well.

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Sure you can adapt some of their hobbies and so forth, but you still have to maintain your own personality and your own self being. At the end of the day, you have to be yourself…we can never be fully engulfed in one another but in the choices we do make to be closer to that person is more than enough instead of trying to do EVERY SINGLE THING they do just to be with them.

Forever and a day, and then some, people have been having trouble in their romantic relationships. Sometimes two people enter into a relationship that was never meant to be. Other times they just need to find resolution to conflicting issues so they can continue to live in harmony together.

It is common experience that no matter how secure your relationship with your partner or spouse is; you cannot escape conflicts. From a simple argument to a full-blown fight, conflicts can leave us emotionally bruised and take a toll on the relationship.

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Find out if your relationship is in trouble and resolve the issues using these tips

Identify the problem or issues. Have a discussion to understand both sides of the problem, conflicts, needs and preferred outcomes. Clarify to each other exactly what the conflict or problem involves. This is the initial stage where you say what you want and you listen to what your partner wants. The goal at this stage is for you each to clearly express what you each want and to understand what the other wants. Use I message language and avoid the blaming you messages. Also use your active listening skills when you listen to your partner’s side.

Accept that there are at least two points of view. In most situations or disagreements, there are at least two points of view or two ways of looking at something.  By approaching a difference in opinion with this premise in mind, you automatically keep yourself open to resolving the conflict or finding a compromise.

When a caring attitude is combined with effective communication skills, the road to healthy conflict resolution is free of these obstacles. Conflict can be defined in terms of the issues that caused it, the strategies used to address it, and the outcomes that follow from it.

Strategies for resolving or preventing the development of conflict can be classified as avoidance, diffusion, or confrontation.

Emotional awareness is the key to understanding yourself and others. If you don’t know how you feel or why you feel that way, you won’t be able to communicate effectively or smooth over disagreements. Although knowing your own feelings may seem simple, many people ignore or try to sedate strong emotions like anger, sadness, and fear. But your ability to handle conflict depends on being connected to these feelings. If you’re afraid of strong emotions or if you insist on finding solutions that are strictly rational, your ability to face and resolve differences will be impaired.

When emotions flare up, it’s difficult to look at things with a clear head. In the heat of the moment, you sometimes end up doing or saying something you don’t really mean.

When things turn ugly, perhaps it’s best to back off a little bit and cool down for a while. Go out for a walk or call your partner later. It’s not like there’s anything you can do at the moment. You’ll only risk aggravating the situation even more.

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As much as you and your partner love each other, there will always be problems and little disagreements between the two of you. In these instances, it is useful to have a few conflict resolution strategies for couples under your sleeve. With these tactics, you’re more likely to resolve whatever issue you’re dealing with successfully.

You and your partner should never keep a running tally of “wins” and “losses” in your negotiations.

Sadly this is one of the biggest mistakes that I see couples make. Believe me, most people won’t admit this out loud, but they’re keeping score internally, just waiting for the day they finally get to “win.” When you hear your partner (or yourself) complain, “You always get your way. It’s my turn now!” it’s time to realize that score is being kept.

Use “I” statements instead of “you” statements. This helps to keep both sides from getting on the defensive. Realize that words are important. They can be delivered in such a way as to either bring healing or destruction. When the word “you” is used frequently when speaking to your partner, he/she will automatically feel accused. This in turn can provoke unnecessary reactions that will only serve to keep you both from resolving the issues in the most simple and straightforward manner.

Have you fallen in love and hope to stay there? Do you ever wonder if it is possible to love someone for a lifetime? Are you searching for the secret to make your romance last? True love is not a myth! Plenty of couples who fall in love as doe-eyed kids are still just as crazy for each other fifty years down the road.

Great relationships don’t happen by accident! As a matter of fact, that’s true not only of relationships but everything in life. A great anything doesn’t happen without great effort.

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Let’s look at couples who “fall in love” and “stay in love.” We all know that one state does not always lead to the other. “Falling in love” is certainly easier to manage than “staying in love,” so how do happy couples manage to do both?

It’s sound like you fall in love at the first sight. Strong feelings that you feel towards unknown person at your first meet means that both of you attract to one another and that connection is the first sign both of you are belongs to each other. Your intuition told you that you can live and spend the rest of your life besides him forever. Hard to believes? If you’re happy with your relationships, you know it’s true. Or you can ask any happy couples – what makes them happy and stay hold on to their love. Those feelings are combination between emotional and sexual attractions and it can be last by nurture it together.

Your partner and you should understand each other completely, and make each other feel at ease always. Also, some people are not very good at expressing their love and feelings. Learn to show your love otherwise it will reduce the communication between the two of you. A gentle touch, a pat, or a hug is necessary to keep the love alive in your relationship. Be considerate and selfless in your relationship. Always think about the other person before yourself. Let him or her know that you care for them.

Don’t keep secrets. Secrets erode the love and the trust. You can have private thoughts, but that’s different than secrets from your mate. Here’s a rule: don’t share any information about him/her with others that you haven’t shared with him/her first.

Never let go the power of communication in your relationship. This is the prime basis of a healthy relationship. Communication can be on a negative and positive side. But, when you communicate effectively, you are maintaining transparency in your relationship. The basis of a good relationship is in case of transparency.

Couples that are intimate with each other, who laugh and play together, stay together. By planning ahead to be intimate with one another you are setting yourself up for a lifetime of romance. When life gets in the way, you will have your best friend, your partner, to help you get through it all. Love is truly wonderful.

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The hallmark of friendship is that each person validates and respects the other person’s feelings and needs. Validation means: What’s important to you is important to me. It’s a key way to make your spouse feel loved.

Respect each other’s need to know

Never shut each other out no matter what you are going through. To entrust your deepest needs and innermost thoughts to your lover might feel like jumping off a cliff but once you take the plunge you’re likely to find the drop is only ten centimetres deep!

Resentment, anger and blame are normal reactions when your loved one does something hurtful. Without forgiveness, however, little hurts as well as betrayals can tear a relationship apart.

“People who don’t forgive often have problems maintaining positive feelings toward their partners,” says Ms. Maisch. “But partners who move toward forgiveness are better able to maintain their connection because they make a conscious decision not to dwell on the mistakes their partner has made.”

Honest communication is top priority for men. They want a woman who answers questions honestly, and perhaps even volunteers information. They want a woman who confidently asks for her wants and needs to be met. They want a woman who can see the truth and tell it like it is while communicating with kindness. Men want a woman who can communicate without being too critical, who cares about preserving his and her dignity.

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Men are expecting their women to always be attractive

Even if you are already in a relationship with the man that you want, it is still important to make yourself attractive. Obviously, physical appearance matters a lot in men. Men want women who are conscious with their looks but not too much. So, if you want to keep a relationship, it is important that you should always make yourself attractive.

Ladies, this means that you take care of yourself, pay attention to your personal style and find time to hang with your fabulous friends and family. You seek adventure by traveling. And you take in life’s pleasures — from indulging in dessert to walking through the park on a sunny day. “You don’t expect your boyfriend to be your entire existence,” says Daily. In other words, you’re not waiting for some man to show up, so you can get your “real life” started

Men want a woman who knows how to love him. A lot of women are so caught up in what they want in a relationship that they tend to ignore what men want in a relationship. What do men want in a relationship? Men want to feel loved by their partner. They want to feel a sense of security and warmth.

Confidence

There is a healthy happy feeling when you are surrounded by confident people.  They inspire you to challenge yourself and you feel good when they achieve their goals.  This type of energy forms the foundation of a strong relationship.  Therefore it is important to be confident in yourself.  Prove to him that you can handle the challenges of life on your own and he will be drawn to your charisma.

Men want women who can be completely trusted, somebody who is always there for them and whom they can share their secrets with. Believe it or not, there are a lot of women who cannot be trusted and are unfaithful. They are a lot that men actually start to become suspicious most of the time. Men can hardly forgive women who are two-timing, so they normally search for somebody he can really trust.

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Women with backbones are attractive. Men like being pampered from time to time, too, of course, and obviously there are times when going the extra mile to be especially caring can be beneficial. But in day-to-day life, don’t become his slave or servant.

Be generous and affectionate; just don’t drool all over him in your attempt to make him happy. You have to be your own person. If you become HIS person, he’ll get bored with you and stop respecting you as a human being.